LOVE HER OR HATE HER?
THE THREE STAGES OF PAIN ARE, DENIAL, ANGER, AND DEPRESSION.
……Well to some the fourth stage would be acceptance although I can only bet on 70% of the world population that gets lucky enough to go through this phase.To some revenge comes in as the fourth phace while some remain stuck in the third stage of their pain as part of their everyday life and acceptance never comes as a next stage whereas some….well…a suicide note is all that is usually left of them.
Ever wondered how you could spend your entire life building a relationship only for it to cause you so much pain, the most unbearable pain and all you get in the name of advice is that you should accept and move on? I wouldn’t say you have,I just don’t think you have.
Many men consider not loving. I don’t blame them,It’s sometimes termed as a curse and if you don’t believe me then wait untill you meet the female version of the devil himself in the name of love that will makes you fall so deep in love that even with evidence of her cheating you’ll still beg her to stay.
This is my story of a journey that begun with a big and blushing smile and ended in a big dashy smile on the receiving end of love..
Her name….oh my …Truphosa..My Truphosa.
Forgiveness…is what I consider null. The three stages of pain have come and passed but the last stage….Acceptance?? the hardest.
At first it she felt my heartbeat and responded with hers and together our hearts did beat as one so I sacrificed the best part of my life to enjoy a life and create memories worth remembering knowing I was in what many would plainly refer to as a love journey only to end up in a love triangle.
Forgive me Lord..at times I develop those Killer Instincts,the kind if feelings that makes you wanna kill by suffocating,holding the person just so tight so close that they’ve got no air to take in.Its slow death,no pain.
Love can make a man mad. The feeling of being the happy one and having someone you can proudly call your own,some you proudly share out to the world to see,the icon in your social media platforms one that completes your status and gives you sleepless nights trying to invent vocabularies that suits her kind and steals her heart can make you damn crazy.But you never realize how bad she might be and you never knowhowdeep the pain can go until the same person you couldn’t do without,one whose texts made all reason in the world becomes the reason yiu have to download a blicking app on your phone,direct texts to the bin and makes the cell less handy.That’s the kind of pain I term as deep.
All I got now for her memories is a picture us in bed on one beautiful afrernoon but all it reminds me of is how cruel and inhuman she really is.
The abortion She took, it’s not only my heart she killed its but my first she killed too and who was I not to forgive? even after she broke my trust and decided to drink from a different tap how could I look into that beautiful face and tell her it couldn’t work? Bless my heart,again I forgave.
And this final blow..where do broken hearts go? This time she left and didn’t think to leave me a break up note,so while I’m stuck in our parafise she already is in her heaven.What court in this world would rule this? give a fair judgement,sentence her for a life damage and I would be there to testify of how broken and irreplacable my heart is,shouldn’t that be a life sentense to be fair?
Oh God of all creation bless my heart and save me from unleashing my deepest demons.And now I’m holding on what we had as the story of my life,one with my favourite chapters and pages I can hardly open.
I mean it when I say Truphosa was amazing,the most exciting woman I so far ever met on earth. I met her one evening on a stream near her home in malichi village –I would say the only village that bore love. Well perfect wasn’t how I viewed her at the top of the hill where I was looking after my late grandpa’s goats. She was just some other village girl I hoped to spend some quality time with while I was still figuring what really life is and now when I look back my body trembles with anger and my blood freezes in my vains,the pain is unbearable,the kind of pain as I said earliersome would kill for and some would never heal.
But here comes my story of how I healed.bring your case in,get your head right,your solution could right here.
You are a tiger. Yes you are.
watch out for the part two of “LOVE HER OR HATE HER” in Love Matters by Iggy.